July 24 is
Cousins Day
Drive-Thru Day
Tell an Old Joke Day
National Tequila Day
Thermal Engineers Day
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MORE! Alexander Dumas, Bella Abzug and Artie Shaw, click
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World Festivals and National Holidays
Ecuador and Venezuela – Simon Bolivar Birthday
Greece – Restoration of Democracy
Peru – Fiesta Patronal San Santiago
United Kingdom – Pylewell Park, Hampshire:
The Curious Arts Festival
United States – Utah: Mormon Pioneer Day
Vanuatu – Children’s Day
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On This Day in HISTORY
1148 – French King Louis VII’s troops lay siege to Damascus during Second Crusade
1487 – Citizens of Leeuwarden, Netherlands, go on strike against a ban on imported beer
1567 – Mary, Queen of Scots, forced to abdicate in favor of her year-old son, James VI
1686 – Benedetto Marcello born, Italian composer, writer and poet
1783 – Simón Bolívar “El Libertador” is born, Venezuelan commander
1802 – Alexander Dumas born, French author and dramatist; The Three Musketeers, The Count of Monte Cristo
1803 – Adolphe Adam born, French composer, noted for the ballets Giselle (1841) and Le corsair (1856)
1823 – Slavery is abolished in Chile
1847 – Brigham Young and his followers arrive at the Great Salt Lake in Utah
1847 – Richard M. Hoe patents rotary-type printing press
1853 – William Gillette born, American playwright and actor; Sherlock Holmes is his signature role
1866 – Tennessee is the first state readmitted to the Union after the Civil War
1868 – Marie Goegg-Pouchoulin founds the Association Internationale des Femmes, the first women’s organization in Switzerland, advocating for women’s rights, education and peace; leads a successful campaign for women’s admission to University of Geneva in 1872
1880 – Ernest Bloch born in Switzerland, American composer, many of his works inspired by his Jewish heritage
1895 – Robert Graves born, English novelist, poet and classical scholar; I, Claudius
1892 – Icie Hoobler born, biochemist and physiologist; first woman to head a local section of the American Chemical Society and to serve as its national president; Director of the Research Laboratory of the Children’s Fund of Michigan
1897 – Amelia Earhart, future pilot, is born
1904 – James Rhyne Killian born, American academic; president of M.I.T. (1948-59); as Special Assistant for Science and Technology to President Eisenhower, he oversees creation of the President’s Science Advisory Committee (PSAC), which helps create NASA after the USSR launches Sputniks 1 and 2
1908 – Cootie Williams born, American Jazz musician
1911 – Hiram Bingham finds ruins of Machu Picchu in the Peruvian Andes
1916 – John D. MacDonald born, American mystery and science fiction writer; Travis McGee mystery series
1920 – Bella Abzug born, lawyer, outspoken feminist, Congresswoman (D-NY 1973-77) and wearer of hats
1922 – Draft of British Mandate of Palestine confirmed by League of Nations Council
1929 – Kellogg-Briand Act, renouncing war as instrument of foreign policy, goes into effect (first signed in Paris in August, 1928, by most leading world powers)
1937 – The state of Alabama drops charges against four of the nine black teenaged men accused of raping two white women on a train – the infamous ‘Scottsboro Boys’ case; others spend years in prison even after the women recant, admitting their story is false
1938 – Artie Shaw records “Begin the Beguine”
1944 – Jim Armstrong born, Irish guitarist with Them and Sk’Boo, also played some with The Doors, Captain Beefheart and Frank Zappa
1950 – Cape Canaveral begins operations, launching a Bumper rocket
1959 – The “kitchen debate” between U.S. Vice President Richard Nixon and Soviet leader Nikita Khrushchev takes place at the American National Exhibition opening in Moscow, in the exhibition’s model kitchen; they discuss washing machines, capitalism, the free exchange of ideas, summit meetings, rockets and ultimatums
1965 –The Byrds’ cover of Dylan’s “Mr. Tambourine Man” is the #1 single in the UK
1969 – NASA’s returning Apollo 11 splashes down safely in the Pacific after its manned moon mission
1974 – U.S. Supreme Court rules 9-0 that President Nixon must turn over subpoenaed White House tapes to Watergate special prosecutor
1979 – Ted Bundy is convicted of first-degree murder by a Miami jury for killing two women college students
1985 – Disney releases animated film, The Black Cauldron
1987 – Hulda Crooks, 91-years-old, becomes oldest person to climb Japan’s Mount Fuji
1990 – Iraq masses huge numbers of troops and tanks on its border with Kuwait
1990 – Pantera’s first major release, “Cowboys from Hell”
1995 – Three-night celebration of Frank Sinatra’s 80th birthday begins at Carnegie Hall
2002 – U.S. House of Representatives expels Representative James Traficant (D-OH) after he is convicted in federal court of bribery, tax evasion and racketeering
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My contribution to “Tell an Old Joke” Day: It’s an engineer joke.
An engineer dies and goes to Hell. As he is being given his initial tour, a minor imp shows him where on the seven circles, he will begin his eternal punishment. He interrupts, saying he needs to speak with the CEO. The imp laughs and ignores his request. He persists and somehow wears down the imp’s patience and the imp finally escorts him into Satan’s office.
Satan grins at him. “WHAT? You think you should be transferred? Let me guess…”
“No, not at all,” says the engineer. “Clearly I deserve this. But you, and your illustrious staff, do not. You need some serious improvements in the working environment down here and I can provide them; I was a bad person but a good engineer.” Satan is interested. The engineer continues: “You have poor ventilation, terrible. I can fix that.” Satan asks a few preliminary questions and then decides to go along; after all, what’s a few weeks’ discount off Eternity? The engineer gets to work and within a few weeks, Hell’s staff is breathing easy and well invigorated. The imp then continues the engineer’s tour, but he asks to see Satan again. This time he advises, “You need an escalator system between each circle of Hell and the next. I can put that in for you. Again Satan goes along. A few months later, the trips up and down the circles have become efficient and elegant. Yet a third time the imp’s progress is interrupted with a new idea and again Satan approves engineering improvements as the engineer redesigns the freezing and roasting sections, and things are really looking up in Hell.
Suddenly god gets wind of the activity in Hell. He thunders down to Satan: WHAT IS GOING ON?
Satan responds, proudly: “I have an engineer and we are being beautifully redesigned! HA HA!”
God then decides: “I need him up here. Prepare him for transfer.”
Satan reminds God: “You can’t do that! Remember there is no appeal: Once the decision is made and I get a soul, I keep that soul forever! It’s the law!”
God is adamant: “I will sue you and get that engineer!”
Satan laughs uproariously: “Where are YOU going to find a lawyer?”
LOL – a really good one!