It is New Year’s Eve, so in order to assist those aviators and airport bums who enjoy entertaining at home, I present the secret recipe for the concoction known to Royal Canadian Air Force personnel as “Moose Milk”. Originally made with milk obtained from a lactating Alces alces, the practice was eventually curtailed.
There was one problem. The North American moose is the largest member of the deer family. A cow moose weighs as much as 880 pounds and stands almost seven feet tall. They tend toward an irritable disposition, especially when people start pulling on their lady moose parts.
Too many pilots and flight crew members began attending morning “sick parades” due to a variety of “non-combat related” injuries, leaving no one to “slip the surly bonds”.
The current RCAF Moose Milk recipe is made using milk from domesticated cows, available at your local grocer or supermarket.
RCAF MOOSE MILK
12 Egg yolks
40 Oz Canadian Whiskey
40 Oz Rum
5 Oz Kahlua
10 Oz Maple Syrup
40 Oz Milk (homogenized – don’t use skim milk!)
40 Oz Heavy Whipping Cream (not canned)
1 Cup Sugar
Beat yolks until fluffy and well mixed.
Add sugar and beat mixture until thick.
Stir in milk and liquor
Chill at least 3 hours. Best if can sit overnight.
Then: Whip cream until good and thick (canned whip cream will go flat, so avoid canned cream)
Fold in whipped cream (it will appear as if it has totally thinned out, but don’t worry, that is normal)
Chill for another hour.
Sprinkle the top with nutmeg and cinnamon.
Should be kept chilled because of the raw eggs.
This should not be a problem as Moose Milk disappears quite quickly.
Should serve a crowd of fifty….
Or ten pilots.
Or five crew chiefs.